All You Need Is Love
Obviously with my wedding coming up I have been doing a lot of thinking (both forward and backwards). This is combined with a conversation I had with one of my most amazing friends in the world yesterday (Shanna) about a series they are bringing back on NPR called 'This I Believe.' Being the loser that I am, I looked up the series today and listened to the Podcast (I haven't listened to the radio since the invention of the in-car CD player). All of this combined to get me thinking even more.
Relationships, especially marriages, are a funny thing. I am not sure how natural they are. I read a stat somewhere, sometime, that only somewhere around 3% of mammals are monogamous. That is amazing. I am not sure if humans would be considered that way since most people have sex with more than one person in their lifetimes. Not sure if other sea otters (are they even mammals?) have a hot dating scene or not. Maybe they do and just like to be players.
Anyways, I just want to say that I believe in love. I believe in marriage (obviously). I don't believe that everyone needs to be married or that marriage is a goal. The general idea that you aren't successful unless you are married is part of the reason our divorce rate is 41% (just like owning a home is what makes you successful leads to a high foreclosure rate). If you don't want to get married, don't.
This all being said, I am very unapologetic in that my marriage is the most important aspect of my life. If Mike & Mike in the Morning said I could take over for Mike Golic (I would love to work with Greenie) said I could have the job if I left Katie, I wouldn't. Not in a million years. Not because I don't think having a great career is important, I desperately want a career that I am proud of; however, there is also something to be said of being a great husband and dad. Too many dad's have fallen victim to the demands of capitalism. I will never be that guy. People say I don't need to because I am marrying a doctor, but those who know me best know that has nothing to do with it.
I think that too many couples have ruined marriage for so many people. It doesn't have to be what it has become. Marriage is often seen either as a requirement or a hassle. Why can't it just be great for some? Why does it have to be something like a means to an end? People try to find love just so they can get married, and then divorced. This sours people, and that sourness is contagious, and has infected a whole generation of people.
My goal is to be happily married. That married couple that makes other people want to be married, but doesn't make you feel like you have to be married. Honestly, I don't care. I hate people that want marriage, but don't want to be married (ask if that doesn't make sense).
Probably a few move posts on this subject to come. What typically happens is I get an idea on my mind (and it seems great). I sit down to write, get a few paragraphs in, and then it derails. Sadly I am too impatient to proofread too. Guess Rolling Stone will never come calling, huh?
Relationships, especially marriages, are a funny thing. I am not sure how natural they are. I read a stat somewhere, sometime, that only somewhere around 3% of mammals are monogamous. That is amazing. I am not sure if humans would be considered that way since most people have sex with more than one person in their lifetimes. Not sure if other sea otters (are they even mammals?) have a hot dating scene or not. Maybe they do and just like to be players.
Anyways, I just want to say that I believe in love. I believe in marriage (obviously). I don't believe that everyone needs to be married or that marriage is a goal. The general idea that you aren't successful unless you are married is part of the reason our divorce rate is 41% (just like owning a home is what makes you successful leads to a high foreclosure rate). If you don't want to get married, don't.
This all being said, I am very unapologetic in that my marriage is the most important aspect of my life. If Mike & Mike in the Morning said I could take over for Mike Golic (I would love to work with Greenie) said I could have the job if I left Katie, I wouldn't. Not in a million years. Not because I don't think having a great career is important, I desperately want a career that I am proud of; however, there is also something to be said of being a great husband and dad. Too many dad's have fallen victim to the demands of capitalism. I will never be that guy. People say I don't need to because I am marrying a doctor, but those who know me best know that has nothing to do with it.
I think that too many couples have ruined marriage for so many people. It doesn't have to be what it has become. Marriage is often seen either as a requirement or a hassle. Why can't it just be great for some? Why does it have to be something like a means to an end? People try to find love just so they can get married, and then divorced. This sours people, and that sourness is contagious, and has infected a whole generation of people.
My goal is to be happily married. That married couple that makes other people want to be married, but doesn't make you feel like you have to be married. Honestly, I don't care. I hate people that want marriage, but don't want to be married (ask if that doesn't make sense).
Probably a few move posts on this subject to come. What typically happens is I get an idea on my mind (and it seems great). I sit down to write, get a few paragraphs in, and then it derails. Sadly I am too impatient to proofread too. Guess Rolling Stone will never come calling, huh?
posted by Phillip @ Monday, May 11, 2009
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